According to the Urban Dictionary, ghosting is "the act of suddenly ceasing all communication with someone."  Personally, I have been married for almost 20 years, so when I hear popular shows, movies, and lyrics reference "being ghosted", I feel grateful that am no longer dating.  However, ghosting occurs to everyone, not just daters.   Alas, I am not safe.  It happens in the professional world, too.  In fact, it has recently happened to me, and I felt like Ducky in the 1980s cult classic, Pretty in Pink, "Do I offend?"

In the professional world, building relationships and maintaining effective communication are essential for success. However, we've all experienced situations where someone unexpectedly goes silent, leaving us in a state of confusion and frustration. This phenomenon is known as "professional ghosting," and it can occur in various contexts, such as job applications, networking, collaborations, or even within existing work relationships. In this blog, we'll explore the impact of professional ghosting and provide practical strategies on how to handle these situations with grace and professionalism.

Understanding Professional Ghosting

Professional ghosting occurs when a person suddenly ceases communication without explanation. This silence can manifest in many ways: unanswered emails, unreturned calls, or a complete halt in correspondence. While it's crucial not to take it personally, it's essential to acknowledge that ghosting can affect one's confidence, emotional well-being, and overall perception of the professional world.

Why Does Ghosting Happen?

Several reasons might explain why someone ghosts you in a professional setting:

1. Time Constraints: Busy schedules can lead individuals to prioritize urgent matters, inadvertently putting non-urgent communication on the back burner.

2. Change of Priorities: Circumstances change, and what might have been important initially may no longer hold the same significance.

3. Disinterest or Uncertainty: The other person might be unsure about continuing the relationship or collaboration but is unsure how to communicate this.

4. Fear of Conflict: Some people avoid confrontation or delivering disappointing news, resorting to silence as an easier way out.

5. Technical or Communication Issues: In today's digital age, messages can get lost in cyberspace or may end up in spam folders, leading to unintentional ghosting.

What to Do When Ghosted:

1. Don't Jump to Conclusions: Resist assuming the worst. Give the benefit of the doubt and consider the possibility that there might be a valid reason for the lack of communication.  

2. Follow-Up (Once or Twice): If a reasonable amount of time has passed, send a polite and gentle follow-up message. Avoid accusatory language and instead express your desire to connect or discuss the matter at hand.

3. Be Persistent but Not Annoying: While it's essential to show determination in maintaining the relationship, bombarding the person with constant messages is likely to backfire.

4. Reflect on Your Approach: If you've been ghosted by multiple individuals, reflect on your communication style and ensure it's professional, respectful, and engaging.

5. Seek Feedback (If Possible): If the relationship was well-established before the ghosting, inquire politely if there's a specific reason for the lack of response, and if there is any feedback on how you could improve.

6. Expand Your Network: While it's disheartening to be ghosted, don't dwell on it excessively. Focus on expanding your network, reaching out to other professionals, and exploring new opportunities.

7. Don't Burn Bridges: Even if you feel hurt or frustrated, avoid venting on social media or publicly criticizing the person who ghosted you. Maintaining professionalism is crucial for your reputation.

8. Learn from the Experience: Use the situation as a learning opportunity. Consider how you can handle similar situations better in the future and establish communication guidelines with future collaborators.

9. Seek Insight:  Since this is a connected world (or as the saying goes, "a small world"), reach out to mutual connections to garner indirect insight as to why you may have been ghosted.

Conclusion:

Professional ghosting can be a tough pill to swallow, but it's essential to remember that it's a common occurrence in today's fast-paced and digital-driven world. Professional ghosting is often not about you. However, in the instances where you think you may have made a person uncomfortable, like being too persistent (Stop looking at me! 😂), try to course correct and learn a better approach for next time.  While you can't control the actions of others, you can choose how you respond to such situations. Maintain professionalism, be persistent yet respectful, and use ghosting as an opportunity for growth. Building and maintaining professional relationships may be challenging, but with the right approach, you can navigate the uncomfortable silence and continue forging meaningful connections in your career journey.

Remember this.  I don't know who said this, but they are very wise words.  "You can be the whole package but be at the wrong address."